Parent-thetical Expressions

A picture can be worth a thousand words, especially when it’s a picture of parents trying to do their parent thing. Some pictures recently posted on the internet might be expressed as nice try, way funny, didn’t work or darn, I almost got away with it.


One mom decided to wean her seven-year-old off sugary soda. She sent the fizzy liquid down the drain and replaced it with apple juice. The rationale behind this attempt was that the sight of the can would fool the child’s taste buds. It did not, judging by the face the little one made upon tasting.


Another set of parents wanted to encourage frequent bathing. So they told their two young sons they used to have another brother, but he turned into a mushroom from never having a bath. To carry the point, mom and dad even added his cone-shaped and speckled picture to the family album.


Sometimes parents need to address an issue; however, they may choose to do it behind a different identity. Little Emily received this note:


My Dearest Emily,


I came by tonight to retrieve your tooth and leave your payment–however, because of the condition of your bedroom, I had a horrible time getting to your bed. I will have to come by on a different night. Perhaps you can take the time between now and then to properly clean and organize your room.


Much Love,


The Tooth Fairy


Hold on a minute–I think this might violate the terms of the Child-Tooth Fairy contract


But no matter what, when birthdays roll around parents want to express their love for their offspring. Even if it’s not always totally appropriate. A creative mom made a birthday cake in an amorphous, wiggly shape. Then she wrote on it, “I’m glad you were the strongest sperm.”


Dealing with kid shenanigans can sometimes make parents long for the days when they themselves were carefree and horrible. One couple decided to get into some spontaneous mischief. So they went to the Museum of Glass and had their picture taken covering up the GL.


Best selfie ever!

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